// Life isn't always a bowl of cherries

Hello Internet!

This will be my very first "venting"-post as a lot of things happened during the past weeks, months and years and I somehow have that voice in my head telling me to write about it.

Long story short: This will be a long text and only one or two pics in the end haha

I don't even know why I'm blogging about this and I know a lot of people will say I should have kept things to my mind but wanna know a secret? I kept a lot of things to myself for too long and at some point, it feels like everything just adds up to a huge blanket of self-doubts and sadness and you become some sort of a human burrito.

Have you ever seen a human burrito?

Nope, you haven't.

And that's why human burritos feel alone.

Okay, I know nothing of the above made sense but if you somehow got the point, we should probably talk.

We'd be great friends.

The main reason why I'm writing this is probably my mother's 2nd wedding. She's going to get married to her boyfriend in May (One day before my 5SOS concert. How great is that...). They'd been together for about 12 years now and yea, if you're not that bad at math, you found out he's not my dad.

Maybe that's the reason why the thought of her getting married to him puts me in some sort of a sad mind palace (If you got that "mind palace" thing, we should deffo become friends).

I even started crying when she told me about it. Very mature, aren't I?

It's just like.. I've always been more of a "daddy's girl", tbh.

But unlike the common definition of a "daddy's girl" I'm neither "spoilt" nor "bratty". I just get along well with him whereas I'm constantly arguing with my mother and this has been going on for years (even my 7th.10th grade teacher noticed it oops) so this prolly led to me hiding my feelings and I even stopped talking to her for a while. I even moved in with my dad for a few months.

But after crying in front of her about the wedding and everything that had been on my heart for so long things got better.

Kinda unbelievable haha 

I could also talk about that guy that broke my heart last year.

He's the biggest load of f*ckin bullf*ck ever.

Even my best friend hates him after all this stuff. 

Haha done.

This is one thing I've learnt after he had left my life:

Never ever trust a guy.

Don't tell him you love him until you're 100% sure he's THE one.

And even if you think you're 100% sure, you probably aren't.

And you should always keep one thing in your mind:

if you're ever feeling down because of school, friends, love etc and you just feel like crying:

Cry.

It's not a sign of weakness, it actually relieves you.

Cry as long as you want, dry your tears and find something that makes you happy.

It could be something small like having a coffee at Costa or Starbucks with your closest friend (or even alone! It's not too bad to do something on your own) or just taking a walk and listening to music or you could save some money and do something you've always wanted to do. Ever wanted to go to Paris for a few days? Do it. 

Just don't necessarily skip school for this. Wait until you're on holidays haha

So that's it for today.

The next posts will be my original "theme" again.

Either a recipe or a review. Not sure yet haha

Hope you guys have/had a wonderful day and remember:

If you ever need someone to talk, I'm always online :)

x

// Still Alive

Hi Internet!

I hope everyone survived Valentine's Day.

It's actually that day of the year I hate the most just because I don't see the point of it. 

Like, if you love someone you should be able to show it everyday not just on this particular day.

But that's just my opinion. I spent Saturday cleaning my room. 

So no love for me haha

Anyway, I'm ill once again.

My cousin came over the other day and she took her two daughters with her and the youngest had the flu or something and my mum was ill the day after they were here and now, about one week later it seems to be my turn. Ugh.

I stayed at home today and I'll probably do the same tomorrow as school was a torture yesterday and I feel like my head is going to explode and I'm just not feeling well in general.

That's why I rather stay at home for 2-3 days and try to cure this than go to school and end up sick for 3 weeks which would be really unfortunate as I'm going to Glasgow in 18 days (!!!! SO EXCITED :D) and I really don't want to miss this trip.

I bought myself some tulips yesterday. Yea, I buy myself flowers. But I just needed something to cheer me up a bit and tulips are my fave flowers.

So what I did all day was staying in bed, taking some pics of those pretty tulips, drinking tea, reading a book and watching TV with my mum.

I shouldn't have gotten downstairs to watch TV tho. I'm feeling worse now :C

What I've planned for this blog during the next weeks are some makeup reviews, a few recipes (like smoothie recipes, cakes, etc :) ) and a "Let's get ready for Glasgow" post.

And of course a huuuuuge post about Glasgow once I'm back at home. Maybe I'll even film a new YouTube video as I really miss being active on there haha

That's all for now, hope you guys make it through the flunami.

X